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Look at me, posting... - love like me ・ 日記
non solum memento mori, memento vivere sed etiam
Look at me, posting...
No, I'm not dead.

Many thanks to mrurth for the birthday gift! It got here either today or yesterday or possibly anytime this week--I haven't checked my mail in a few days. I can't watch it just yet since raditzsex still has my DVD player, but I know I'll like it.

I also can't watch my HK DVDs (I'm so bad) of Prince of Tennis either, but I'll have a lot better luck convincing her to let me. Say what you will about Hong Kong, but I think 60 episodes for $35 (including shipping) is a damn good deal. I might feel bad about it if the show was licensed in North America, but it isn't, so I'll probably be buying the whole series this way, if the quality isn't horrible. I'm just not prepared to shell out the sort of cash that buys you a 178-episode series when they come 3 eps per DVD, as is sadly the standard here and in Japan. There's 5 eps per DVD in this HK set, which seems like a reasonable compromise between quality and value for money, especially for TV show episodes.

Also, I got my lease-renewal notice today. My lease is up on May 31st, and according to this bit of paper they left in my door clip, as long as I renew for at least 7 months, my rent won't go up. I'm not quite sure whether I should do another 7 months or renew for 13 months, especially since I hope to be graduating soon and I don't know what I'll be doing then, but I guess I've got a week or two to decide. I'm definitely not moving, though. Not until I meet some strong guys to help me. ^_~

The cat is doing fine. He seems to have a sixth sense about when he's about to be photographed, and moves so the picture will blur. Otherwise I would have pictures.

Something odd, though. Lately I've been almost completely averse to food. Nothing sounds good, and I'd really rather not eat, if there was any other way to get rid of that nagging pain in my stomach. This generally means a bout of depression is coming on, and the fact that I recognize it this time doesn't mean anything, since I still don't know what to do about it.

There's a huge pile of clothes on top of my dresser that is slowly percolating its way to the floor because of cat. Clothes that I really need to go through, and probably get rid of most of them. Most of the clothes I have are either falling apart, or threadbare, or both, having been chiefly obtained at thrift shops or for free from various places at least three years ago. I'm serious. I haven't bought any substantial amount of new clothing for the past three years, unless you include jeans, which wear out after about a year. What that means is that I'm about to graduate from college to try to find a real job, and my wardrobe consists of holey jeans and holey tshirts. Trouble is, I have no fashion sense and I hate shopping. Where's a gay man when you need one?

I also need a haircut, but I never know what I want, other than "not this". I was thinking about growing my hair out again, but despite the fact that it looks good, I actually rather hate having hair on the back of my neck and around my ears. But I also hate getting haircuts, because haircuts for women are needlessly expensive, and... well, I've always been afraid of haircuts, to be honest. I'm deathly afraid I'll come out of there and my hair will look stupid. Seeing as I have little else going for me, I'd rather my hair didn't look stupid. It doesn't really look stupid now, but I'm finding that it annoys me to be in that awkward stage between short-enough-not-to-piss-me-off and too-short-to-tie-up. But I'm afraid of haircuts. Which is a silly thing to be afraid of, I know. But the bulk of my self-esteem rides on my hair, and I hate risking that.

Also, I want luv. If anybody knows where I can find some, let me know.
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From: maidofuriel Date: Friday 22nd April 2005 05.34 (UTC) (Link)

I guess you probably don't mean the type of love that you could find on Harry Hines...
valamelmeo From: valamelmeo Date: Friday 22nd April 2005 06.03 (UTC) (Link)
No, but I'm almost to the point where I'd settle for the sort you can find when you're at a club and have had a few too many, as long as they never called me again. But I think I'm getting too old for that sort of thing. I never much liked clubs, anyway. I'm more a pool hall or jazz club sort of girl, since pubs and tapas bars are notoriously difficult to find in this part of the world. ^_~
ang_grrr From: ang_grrr Date: Friday 22nd April 2005 06.07 (UTC) (Link)
A girl I work with is frightened of haircuts so has trained herself to cut her own hair. I'm absolutely in awe of her - I wouldn't even begin to attempt taming this stuff.

I haven't had a haircut for about three months. Good job you reminded me.

I can't really help with the rest of the stuff. You'd certainly feel better for dumping all the unwearable stuff so maybe get rid of the obvious stuff before you deal with everying else. If it's all unwearable I can post you a sheet to wrap round you. :)
valamelmeo From: valamelmeo Date: Friday 22nd April 2005 06.26 (UTC) (Link)
That's exactly the problem. I don't want to throw things out until I buy new things, because I'll end up with almost no clothing, and I'll probably still put off shopping because I hate it so much. Then again, with all these old clothes still around, I'm not likely to buy new ones, because I still have things to wear, even if they're things I wouldn't relish being caught dead in. It's a catch-22.

The other problem is the things that have sentimental value attached to them. I realize that's an odd way to feel about an iMac tshirt I got in a dorm clothing swap in 2000, that is now horribly stained and probably has holes in it, but on the other hand I still have a tshirt from my middle school band that should probably be put away for good before all the printing comes off, instead of me wearing it when I've got nothing else. I've also got a pile of blood-donor tshirts that I wouldn't miss at all...

The real problem with my wardrobe, though, is that I don't seem to own anything in between "street corner beggar" and "special occasion"...
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